The all-important Boatiness Quotient

Here’s the remaining games with no comments at all:

All Hands Abandon Ship
Citizen Makane
Creative Cooking
Lake Starlight
Magor Investigates…
One Knight Stand
Out of Scope
The Witch

I would assume All Hands Abandon Ship probably does indeed have a boat :wink:

It would be good to go over all the games again, but we at least have a stab at them.


Oh, thanks for listing these! I’m on my phone so digging up the spreadsheet is a little challenging.

All Hands Abandon Ship: entirely set on a spaceship, 10.

Citizen Makane: don’t recall any boatiness, 1.

Creative Cooking: there’s a river, maybe there are some boats for scenery? Will check my transcript tonight. EDIT: oops, didn’t have a transcript, but I went out and checked out the watery locations (river and pond) but there are no watercraft to be found. 1.

Hawkstone: didn’t get very far with this, but the non interactive opening has you dropped off from a boat, which I think ekes out a 4? Hopefully others who played further can say if there’s more boatiness later.

Lake Starlight: set on a lake but no boat travel as such, but I think they’re mentioned as scenery, and an NPC tells a story involving piracy. Either a 2 or 3? EDIT: no boats in the scenery, but there is a boat house in addition to the story, so I think this is a 3. Though I actually am now agreeing with Andrew’s thought in post 1 that maybe 2 and 3 should have been flipped, since a noninteractive boat feels more boat-y than the mere implication of a boat. Rather late in the day to make that change though so maybe a grow for next year’s Boatiness Quotient.

Magor Investigates…: no boats so far as I remember. 1

One Knight Stand: ditto. 1

Out of Scope: I wasn’t able to finish this due to a bug. The main characters are part of a naval family, so feels like at least a 3 to me.

The Witch: also didn’t finish this; there’s definitely a river but don’t remember any boats specifically. EDIT: Read over my transcript and also the walkthrough one posted on the Comp site, and I’m not seeing anything. 1.

Having done these double-checks, I’ll put these numbers into the sheet.


It’s been 11 hours since I found out I placed 6th, and was shocked and humbled.

Now I’m just mad that LAKE Adventure has a high boat score and a higher rating than me so even if my 2am maths isn’t up to figuring out the actual results I do realise that I can’t win the Boat Goat.

shakes fist at BJ Best for living up to their name


Thanks to the mathematical efforts of our own @lpsmith, I believe we officially have…a BOAT GOAT.

Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of this year’s inaugural prize is…

To Sea in a Sieve!

With a score of 7.18, a rank of 11, and a BOATINESS QUOTIENT of 10, it gets a score of 17.18 by raw sum, and 86.5 by the Boat Goat Index, putting it well above any other competitors. It’s also the highest-ranking game to take place entirely on a boat!


Arrgh, now what can I say? Ye’ve warmed the cockles o’ me heart, so ye have, an’ the mussels too, I reckon! I’ll cherish this Boat Goat, me bullies, ye may be sure o’ that, an’ keelhaul, burn an’ sink me if I don’t! A right merry fellow he looks, an’ a prime sailorman he’ll make, I’m sure. Thank’ee all for bringin’ a smile to me old mug! :skull_and_crossbones: :goat: :slightly_smiling_face:


A BGI of 86.5 right out of the gate! Pretty impressive, especially considering no one knew there would even be a BGI. Congrats, @J_J_Guest!

Of course, I vow to do even better next year with my game (whose title you should not steal) You Are a Boat with the tagline (which you definitely should not steal) “A trolling game”.

Thanks to Admirals Stezler and Schultz for taking the fun idea and making it real.


Hmm. I would have expected And Then You Become a Boat Not Unlike the Previous One.



Will the next installment feature a goat?


I’m already hoping for a game that incorporates a Goat Boat of some kind.


Boaty McBoatface Gets Swabbed In The Deck!!