(Chapter the Sixteenth, continued)
So the TLDR of the above is there’s a lot of stuff here, but we have a couple simple how-to guides. First, from the diagram:
…the diagram doesn’t go into any more detail as to what the overall system is meant to do, but following its logic, connecting the control panel to the overlay engine, connecting the overlay engine to the faraday cage, connecting the dimensional stabilizer to the faraday cage, and then plugging both the faraday cage and control panel into the outlet ought to be enough to make it work.
And the checklist:
Ensure the system is properly connected.
Ensure the door is closed.
Plug in units that need electricity.
Insert desired card and turn on control panel.
Turn on dimensional stabilizer before opening door.
Check status lights before opening door.
Take any other precautions before opening door.
Let’s take this step by step:
>connect control panel to overlay engine
(the control panel system cable to the overlay engine receptacle)
The control panel system cable is plugged in to the overlay engine receptacle.
Per the system diagram, this looks correct.>connect overlay engine to cage
(the faraday cage receptacle)
The overlay engine system cable is plugged in to the faraday cage receptacle.
Per the system diagram, this looks correct.>connect stabilizer to cage
(the faraday cage receptacle)
The dimensional stabilizer system cable is plugged in to the faraday cage receptacle.
Per the system diagram, this looks correct.>plug cage into outlet
The faraday cage power cord is plugged in and the faraday cage comes to life with a whine pitched right at the edge of your hearing.
Based upon the diagram, this seems correct.>plug panel into outlet
(the control panel power cord into the power outlet)
The control panel power cord is plugged in and you hear a brief electrical noise as the control panel buzzes to life.
Based upon the diagram, this seems correct.
I think that’s everything? The “seems correct” is half-reassuring, half-worrisome, but I guess we’ll see when we boot things up.
Now it’s time to work through the checklist, picking a card at random:
>put ae9b711d in control panel
You put the AE9B711D punch card into the control panel card slot.>turn on panel
(the control panel)
The needle on the power readout creeps up to around 100 out of 100.
Something seems to be happening in the faraday cage.>turn on stabilizer
(the dimensional stabilizer)
You switch the dimensional stabilizer on.
I think this should be working?
>x cage
The faraday cage is about seven feet tall and perhaps four feet wide. Its door has a crescent-shaped window in it that enables you to somewhat see inside it. It’s wrapped (as best as possible while still allowing the door, which is now closed, to work) with tightly-wound copper wire. A row of three lights is arranged across the top above the door: a green bulb (currently lit), a yellow bulb (currently unlit), and a red bulb (currently unlit). On the bottom there is a receptacle for cables (it has an overlay engine system cable and a dimensional stabilizer system cable connected now). There is also a power cord dangling from the back of it that is plugged into the outlet.
Green is a good sign! There’s more detail now too:
Through the window of the faraday cage - although it’s clearly impossible - you can feel as much as see another reality. It looks like the interior floor of the faraday cage is now stagnant water and the space beyond the now translucent walls is filled with decaying trees and other unhealthy plant life. The sky glows in an eerie maroon that not even an abstract painter lost in madness would deign to paint it.
You could possibly see more inside by opening the door.
That doesn’t seem super pleasant, but reasonably safe? And why did we do all this work if not to explore strange new worlds!
>open door
An eldritch mass of tentacles and teeth swings down through the door at you from somewhere!
Inexplicably something seems to drive it back inside before it can reach you. It may not be a bad idea to close the door now that it’s back in there.
Aaaah!
>close door
You close the faraday cage.
Ok screw exploring strange new worlds, I think but for the protective sign our goose would have been cooked there. I wish there was something safer than just trial-and-error, but presumably everyplace Edwin visited he came back from, since we didn’t find this place all plugged in with a card still in the panel…
We shut things down, pull the card, and try again with lucky number 00a02209.
Through the window of the faraday cage you can feel as much as see another reality. It looks like the interior floor of the faraday cage is now obscured by a thick foggy mist with only occasional glimpses showing what may be bog underneath. A too-small, too-blue sun bathes the landscape in an unwholesome light through a violet sky.
Also not especially enticing, but the light’s green so let’s give it a run:
>open door
Something like a giant slug drops onto your leg from the inside of the door as you open it! You feel a sting followed by numbness that quickly encompasses your entire body, and you fall down paralyzed. You’re unable to even blink, so you have to watch as more of the limacine creatures start to slide out of the faraday cage.*** The End ***
Jesus, what are the yellow and red places like???
We undo and try bachelor number three:
>put c353f128 in panel
(the control panel card slot)
(first taking the C353F128 punch card (smelling faintly of mildew))
You put the C353F128 punch card (smelling faintly of mildew) into the control panel card slot.
By the end of this every single object in Backwater, VT is going to smell of mildew.
Through the window of the faraday cage you can feel as much as see another reality. It is like looking onto a stark rocky plain with a cloudless twilight sky above. In the distance beyond the translucent inner walls of the faraday cage you can see some mountains and craters. It’s a perplexing view, as the horizon seems too close and the sharpness of vision does not seem to drop off like you’d expect.
This is yellow, which is not especially encouraging…
>enter cage
(the faraday cage)
(getting off the heavy-duty table)
Your stomach lurches as you enter an area where two separate realities seem to be somehow coexisting in the same space. It makes you lose all sense of direction.Although the faraday cage somehow seems to protect everything outside it from the raw vacuum in this environment, it apparently can’t protect someone who directly enters it. You have an extremely unpleasant final few minutes.
*** The End ***
Geez, what do you need to do to get to red?
Maybe we’ll be fourth time lucky with 0b46e931? This is our last shot:
Through the window of the faraday cage you can feel as much as see another reality. It is a desert landscape with a pyramid in the distance that looks neither Central American nor Egyptian, but rather something unwholesome and inhuman. A doorway in it opens out into a cramped plaza decorated with obscene snake statuary, and heat shimmers mostly obscure the inner walls of the faraday cage.
Oh hey, that looks more promising! And the indicator is green. I’m cautiously optimistic:
Your stomach lurches as you enter an area where two separate realities seem to be somehow coexisting in the same space. It makes you lose all sense of direction.
The overlaid space
It is a desert landscape with a pyramid in the distance that looks neither Central American nor Egyptian, but rather something unwholesome and inhuman. A doorway in it opens out into a cramped plaza decorated with obscene snake statuary, and heat shimmers mostly obscure the inner walls of the faraday cage.Some sort of bipedal lizard emerges from the pyramid. It sees you and hisses something that sounds like “Minu? Lukur kasadu! Dakusu!”
A ghastly spectral cuckoo flies out of the round white wall clock (smelling faintly of mildew) and squawks, “The time is now eleven o’clock!” before vanishing into thin air.
Don’t worry lizard guy, that’s just how we say hello in my dimension (that’s been happening continually throughout the last couple of playthroughs, I’ve just been editing it out).
The lizard man picks up a handful of javelins.
Er. I think maybe they don’t like clocks.
>x lizard
Before you get the chance the lizard man hurls a javelin, striking you in the chest.*** The End ***
Well that was a profoundly botched first contact scenario.
We can go back and try different stuff – including not inflicting a ghost-cuckoo on the guy – but the only real variation in outcome is that sometimes the javelin hits us in the head.
…we’re out of punch cards but short of using the keypunch to type in random codes on some of the blanks I’m not sure where we can go. There has to be some kind of lead in the book, I think, and after a bunch of trial-and-error of looking stuff up (Edwin didn’t have much to say about lizards, go figure), I realize I’d skipped a step:
>read edwin
I write this journal in part for you, brother, for although we have our Differences and disagree on methods, you are likely the only one to fully appreciate my Work and correspondingly the only one to further it should I perish in my efforts.We both need to face Dangers and make sacrifices to seek the Truth. It is only through this Truth that the name of Cragne may be restored to its rightful glory and our proper place be returned.
As it has become clear that we are at War, the stakes have grown higher. While I can respect your conservatism during peacetime, it has no place now. Your restrictions to using livestock for experimentation are causing unacceptable delays in your progress, and make no mistake, if one of the farmers ever catches you making your parts collections or leaving behind the lifeless remains, they will look upon you no more kindly than they would look upon me for making use of vagrants that none shall miss. Your squeamishness serves no purpose and offers no advantage. It is time to be strong.
But I have made progress, even where you have stalled! The things I have seen! Mind-twisting realities you can only imagine! My System here works for a wide range of alien environments. I have successfully overlaid these other realities with our own in a controlled manner, and have freely entered many to make observations, collect samples, and even interact with natives. I have gazed upon the ancient city of Kadath across the plains of Leng; conversed with the fungi of Yuggoth; and found riches in dark Swamps heretofore unknown to any sentient life.
I have left a System Diagram showing how the system may be properly connected, and a Safety Checklist. I have also included brief descriptions of each component in this journal to get you started should you find me dead (or not find me at all). In addition, this volume contains a record of my travels and philosophy as described above, and it would behoove you to consult it.
(Be aware that anything left in the Faraday cage when a new reality is overlaid will appear in my junkroom [FFFFFFFF]. For reasons I have yet to determine, most objects maintain their molecular structure when so transported, but punch cards lose their holes and return to virgin status. As strange as this is, I must admit it’s quite convenient.)
Finally, I have been seeking other like-minded Men of Power to assist us in our Work. There are others who have goals close enough to our own that we may profitably work together to make the most of this War and grant us all that which we deserve.
Oh, there we go! This is helpful background and provides some answers – if he was using random hobos as test subjects, Edwin’s rather cavalier approach to flagging danger via warning lights makes more sense. He also intersperses a lot of random capitalization into his writing – some of which seems kinda alchemical, banging on about the Work etc., but could also be a sign that he’s much, much older than the mid-century dates would suggest (that’s a 18th Century affectation).
We can immediately try to go to the junkroom, though that seems more like a failsafe if you run out of blank cards. Let’s try to dig a little deeper into the journal first:
>consult edwin about war
This new War has the potential to surpass even the Great War, and the ordinary people still have no idea what is really happening in Europe. And they criticize us!
…strong “at least we’re not as bad as the Nazis” energy here from Edwin.
>consult edwin about men of power
The Illuminati are real and nearby, in spite of Vernon Stauffer’s assertion to the contrary. He uncovered the evidence of the truth and missed it even as he wrote of it. I have placed his work in my secret cache where I keep my greatest treasures.>>consult edwin about vernon
He lacks imagination and his book is dry, but his research is solid. I arranged for his book to be brought here from Massachusetts, a small town called Saugus not too far from Anchorhead, and made part of our library.
Ha, nice hat-tip to Saugus. This name is dimly familiar, and I confirm that this is a real book – Stauffer was one of the folks who stoked anti-Illuminati conspiracy theories in the early 20th Century. It’s of course also familiar because this is one of the books we need for the library!
>consult edwin about treasures
It is in an overlaid reality of course. I won’t write out the hex code plainly here, but know brother that your methods of experimentation inspired my choice of it. How felicitous that your inanimate cow flesh could be thus translated!
Ah, that sounds promising! Let’s start with the junkroom just for completeness’ sake.
>put blank in keypunch slot
You put the blank punch card (smelling faintly of mildew) into the keypunch card slot.>x keypad
It is a hex keypad (that is, a keypad with only 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, A, B, C, D, E, and F) and requires the setting of exactly eight digits. It is currently set to 00000000.>set keypad to ffffffff
You have successfully changed the card punch setting to FFFFFFFF.>pull handle
(the keypunch handle)
The card gets punched. Its new code is “FFFFFFFF”.
The card now seems to be very flimsy; it may no longer be safe to use.
That’s a little worrisome, but as we’ve seen “safe” is decidedly relative around here.
>take ffffffff
Taken.>put it in panel
You put the FFFFFFFF punch card (smelling faintly of mildew) into the control panel card slot.
We fire things up and get a green light:
Through the open door of the faraday cage you can feel as much as see another reality. Now it looks like the interior of a sparsely-furnished log cabin with the translucent outlines of the inner walls of the faraday cage where there ought to be solid normal walls.
>enter it
Your stomach lurches as you enter an area where two separate realities seem to be somehow coexisting in the same space. It makes you lose all sense of direction.The overlaid space
Now it looks like the interior of a sparsely-furnished log cabin with the translucent outlines of the inner walls of the faraday cage where there ought to be solid normal walls.
This is a supremely boring space – there isn’t any scenery to interact with, and even the punch cards I brought remain the same (though it could be that the junkroom’s punchcard-resetting properties only extend to those that were recently blanks).
The treasure room was more promising anyway, but Edwin didn’t spell out the code that gets us there, he just coyly hinted at it, with a dig at his brother’s squeamishness about restricting his test subjects to animals. It’s probably a word, and since we’re dealing with hex it can only use letters from A-H, and must be eight digits. “Cow flesh” is “beef”, which is four, so maybe “inanimate” means “dead”?
>put blank in keypunch
…
>set keypad to deadbeef
You have successfully changed the card punch setting to DEADBEEF.>pull handle
We load up the new card and see if we solved the riddle:
Through the window of the faraday cage you can feel as much as see another reality. Now it looks as though there is a completely different room within the bounds of the faraday cage, or actually beyond its bounds as you can see the translucent outlines of its inner walls where there ought to be solid normal walls. It looks far more pleasant than the boiler room.
“Far more pleasant than the boiler room” doesn’t narrow things down as much as we’d like, but we’ve got a green light so it’s probably safe to poke our head in.
>enter it
Your stomach lurches as you enter an area where two separate realities seem to be somehow coexisting in the same space. It makes you lose all sense of direction.The overlaid space
Now it looks as though there is a completely different room within the bounds of the faraday cage, or actually beyond its bounds as you can see the translucent outlines of its inner walls where there ought to be solid normal walls. It looks far more pleasant than the boiler room.In the overlaid space you can see a marble end table (on which are a book New England and the Bavarian Illuminati and a golden apple).
Aha! We are in. We grab the book and start perusing:
>x illuminati
A nearly featureless hardcover book with a midnight blue cover, one has to squint to make out the faded title book New England and the Bavarian Illuminati on the front. It’s printed much more clearly inside the cover, above the the insignia of the Backwater Public Library. Curiously the Backwater Public Library claim was stamped over an earlier message: “This book is the property of the Saugus Public Library”. This history book has apparently had something of a history of its own. It was written by Vernon Stauffer, A.M., Dean and Professor of New Testament and Church History, Hiram College, in 1918.… Indeed, when a noted Philadelphia minister of the day, the Reverend Ashbel Green, visited New England in 1791, he found an aptitude for polemical discussion on the part of the clergy which impressed him as most extraordinary. Through his contact with the Boston Ministerial Association he encountered “Calvinists, Universalists, Arminians, Arians,” and at least one “Socinian,” all participating in pleasant social intercourse, despite their radical differences of religious opinion…
… The Federalist leaders by their precipitate and inconsiderate action had very much overshot the mark and were about to bring their house tumbling down about their heads. As for the opposition, those of its leaders whose highest political interest was party advantage lived to bless the day when, blinded by hysteria or lust of power, the Federalist party made the alien and sedition acts the law of the land…
… Alexander Hamilton left among his manuscripts certain comments which he had made upon the character and import of the French Revolution. Before we turn to consider the European Illuminati and the outcry against its alleged presence in the United States, we may, by perusing this document, throw a little added light upon the gnawings of anxiety and fear which were felt at the time by very rational gentlemen in America…
… The practical development of this pernicious system has been seen in France. It has served as an engine to subvert all her ancient institutions, civil and religious, with all the checks that served to mitigate the rigor of authority; it has hurried her headlong through a rapid succession of dreadful revolutions, which have laid waste property, made havoc among the arts, overthrown cities, desolated provinces, unpeopled regions, crimsoned her soil with blood, and deluged it in crime, poverty, and wretchedness; and all this as yet for no better purpose than to erect on the ruins of former things a despotism unlimited and uncontrolled; leaving to a deluded, an abused, a plundered, a scourged, and an oppressed people, not even the shadow of liberty to console them for a long train of substantial misfortunes, or bitter suffering…
… This wrath and violence of men against all government and religion, shall be made ultimately, in some way or other, to praise God. All corruptions, in religion and government, as dross must, sooner or later, be burnt up…
I assume these are all excerpts from the real book, which actually makes me really interested in reading it – my understanding is that this burst of conspiracy theorizing about the Bavarian Illuminati fits into an early tradition of distrust of Freemasonry, and leads, via the John Birch Society and others, to the more modern Trilateral Commission/Bilderberg Group/QAnon incarnations of right-wing political paranoia. One of my favorite factoids about American political history is that in the period between the effective dissolution of the Federalist Party and the consolidation of opposition to Jackson’s Democratic-Republicans in the newly-created Whig Party, there was a decade or so when a single-issue party formed to oppose the conspiracy-theory idea that Masons were taking over the country – the reactionary Anti-Masonic Party – were a viable political force and won state and national office.
Of course there was one more thing on the table:
>x apple
This is an apple made from a beautiful yellow metal. It has the inscription “?? ???” subtly engraved into its side. It is so shiny you can almost see your reflection in it.
The Greek characters don’t come through in the transcript, but this transliterates into “ti kallisti”, or “to the fairest” – we’re looking at the Golden Apple of Discord, which Eris is said to have scattered before the gods, inadvertently kicking off the Trojan War when Paris was called in to adjudicate (he awarded it to Aphrodite, who paid him back by having Helen fall in love with him; Hera, angry at being jilted, helps the Greeks organize a war party to bring her back). The apple is the major symbol of the left-wing, countercultural take on the Illuminati conspiracy theory, most notably popularized in the Robert Shea/Robert Anton Wilson trilogy of the same name (it’s a good set of books to read when you’re 16, but I’m not sure it’d hold up now…) More appositely, it’s also the inspiration for IF Comp’s own Golden Banana of Discord.
Anyway, with a quick Hail Eris we yoink the apple – it’s probably just an easter egg, but can’t hurt to have a solid hunk of gold about. Actually, that makes me wonder…
>eat it
The golden apple is made out of some kind of shiny yellow metal. There’s no way you can bite into it.
Oh well.
We leave and deactivate things, then check the coffee to confirm that we’re in fact done. This actually wasn’t so bad! The puzzle definitely has a bunch of different parts, but they’re all explained quite well, and there’s not too much fiddling required – its bark is definitely worse than its bite.
Remembering the warning we got last time we tried to leave, we drop off the journal and the punch cards on the table before crawling down into the hole to see what’s in the Manor’s sub-sub basement.
(concluded very soon!)
