COLOSSAL CAVE OF RECTIFICATION
Transcriptron of an Interactive Fiction session for Adepts, Amateurs, Apprentices, and Other Reagents.
By Medea Oblongata
Release 0.☿
-–
You are standing at the end of a forest path before a small brick building.
A sign reads:
ENTER AT YOUR OWN BECOMING
The building appears simultaneously abandoned and occupied.
A weathered brass plaque says:
TEACHERS, STUDENTS, HYPNOTISTS, CYBERNETICIANS,
AND OTHER SHAPE-CHANGING ENTITIES
PLEASE WIPE YOUR FEET.
NO FEET ARE SELF-WIPING.
YOUR MOTHER DOES NOT [corroded and illegible] HERE
A compass lies here.
The compass points toward uncertainty.
> TAKE COMPASS
Taken.
> INVENTORY
You are carrying:
A compass of uncertainty
A notebook containing several unanswered questions
A quantity of provisional identity
A brass lamp
The lamp is currently off.
-–
> TURN ON LAMP
☿ The lamp glows with a soft Mercurial light. ☿
A nearby squirrel becomes three hypotheses and scampers away. The squirrel is less likely to reappear than the hypotheses, all depending on the chemical reactions from our test screening.
-–
> ENTER BUILDING
You are in the Hall of Orientation. The mouth of a cave yawns in one wall.
A woman, or perhaps a mastermistress, is studying a map.
The map appears to be studying her.
Neither looks particularly confident.
The mastermistress says:
“Excellent. Another explorer.”
She claps her hands and cackles gleefully.
> ASK MASTERMISTRESS ABOUT CAVE
The mastermistress says:
“Some explorers believe the cave contains treasure.”
She pauses… “Others believe it contains truth.”
She pauses again… “Personally I suspect it contains feedback. The entrance is right there.”
-–
> GO EN TRANCE
Ahhhhhh. Open wide! You slip into it.
-–
> GO DEEPER
You go deeper
-–
> GO DEEPER
The throat of the cave gapes below you
-–
> DOWN
You descend.
The passage opens into a large cavern.
A sign reads:
CAVE OF 🜐 MERCURY
The floor appears liquid.
The liquid appears solid.
The distinction seems negotiable.
Twisty passages lead in all directions simultaneously. All alike. Twisty messages indicate hypotheses. All different.
> EXAMINE MERCURY
The Mercury slips into a different interpretation.
It says: “Navigation is merely transformation viewed from the outside.”
A previously unseen passage becomes visible. Another disappears.
-–
> NORTH
You enter the Chamber of Alternative Routes.
There are twenty-seven exits. Each is labelled: “THIS WAY”
A note on the wall reads:
THE MAP IS NOT THE TERRITORY.
THE TERRITORY IS CURRENTLY REVISING THE MAP.
A dwarf is standing here.
He is carrying a slide rule and several paradoxes.
> ASK DWARF ABOUT EXITS
The dwarf shrugs. “I’ve been leaving this room wanting more for years. I always seem to come up short.”
-–
> SOUTH
You return to the Mercury cavern. A lone ranger gallops past on his quick, silver horse.
-–
> EAST
You enter the Hall of 🜍 SULPHUR.
The air is warm. It stinks of brain farts.
A great fire burns in the centre of the chamber.
The flames spell the word “WHY” over and over.
> ASK FIRE ABOUT WHY
The fire replies: “Direction.”
> ASK FIRE ABOUT DIRECTION
The fire replies: “Desire.”
> ASK FIRE ABOUT DESIRE
The fire replies: “WHY”
You suspect recursion.
-–
A sign has appeared:
WARNING!
EXCESSIVE CONSCIOUS PURPOSE MAY CAUSE DOGMA.
A bucket of Mercury is kindly provided to patrons for emergencies.
-–
> WEST
You enter the Grotto of 🜔 SALT.
The walls are crystalline.
The floor is crystalline.
Your boots are considering becoming crystalline.
In the centre of the room, in a briny pool floats a ship.
It appears ancient.
It also appears newly constructed.
A plaque reads: “SHIP OF THESEUS”
It has been retouched several times, but the palimpsest of previous messages is clearly visible in your imagination.
> EXAMINE SHIP
Every plank has been replaced, including the idea of the ship.
-–
> TAKE SHIP
The ship declines. It is already carrying itself. Maybe you can have it shipped?
-–
A crystal formation nearby reads:
…“at blive”…
TO REMAIN
IS TO BECOME
S L O W L Y
ENOUGH
THAT THE PROCESS CAN REMEMBER ITSELF
-–
> DOWN
You crawl into a narrow passage.
You are in the Fertility Chamber of 🜕 NITRE.
At first glance the room appears empty.
At second glance it appears pregnant with possibilities.
Seeds lie scattered everywhere. None have sprouted. Yet.
> PLANT IDEA
Which idea?
> PLANT MAYBE
Planted.
Nothing happens.
A small sign appears:
CHECK BACK IN THREE YEARS
-–
A root emerges from the ceiling. It whispers: “Sudden transformations are usually compost pretending to be lightning.”
The root retracts.
-–
> DOWN
You enter a deep cave.
A sign carved into the stone reads:
🜖 V.I.T.R.I.O.L.
A narrow crack descends into darkness.
A brass plate has the following words etched into its surface:
VISIT THE INTERIOR OF THE EARTH RECTIFY AS NECESSARY
(ADMISSION OPTIONAL, BUT HAVE A CRACK AT IT)
A handwritten note has been taped underneath:
EXPECT MULTIPLE ATTEMPTS
-–
> ENTER CRACK
You squeeze through.
The darkness becomes philosophical.
You are carrying:
A lamp (burning)
Several assumptions
Vague memories of other vanished items
The assumptions illuminate the darkness more effectively than the lamp.
-–
> EXAMINE ASSUMPTIONS
One assumption reads:
I AM THE EXPLORER
Another reads:
THE CAVE IS THE OBJECT OF EXPLORATION
A third appears blank.
There is a quill pen here. The plume has been unromantically removed.
-–
> DROP ASSUMPTION
Which assumption?
> I AM THE EXPLORER
Dropped.
For a moment everything becomes alarmingly symmetrical and evenly spaced out.
[insert psychedelic_montage_final_latest_v17.MOV]
When your vision clears, a new passage has appeared.
-–
> ENTER PASSAGE
You are in the Cavern of 🜘 ROCK SALT.
The chamber is vast. The walls disappear into geological time. The silence appears older than language.
A sign reads:
FOUNDATION LAYER
Another sign below it reads:
NO, BELOW THAT
And another:
BELOW THAT TOO
The signs continue into the bedrock. Shown not as a shelves of marmalade in a rabbit hole, but revealed instead through layers of strata.
-–
The mastermistress is here.
She appears older than when you entered the cave. You suspect the cave has been teaching her. She suspects the same about you.
Neither of you says so directly. Someone’s joints creak. Possibly both of you.
-–
> ASK MASTERMISTRESS ABOUT TREASURE
She points toward a distant crystal.
The crystal bears an inscription:
WHAT SURVIVES WHOLESALE TRANSFORMATION?
Below it, someone has scratched:
> ANSWER QUESTION
The parser replies:
I DON’T KNOW THE WORD “ANSWER”
-–
A grue lurks nearby.
Fortunately it is a pedagogical grue. Instead of eating explorers, it consumes certainties.
The grue regards you thoughtfully.
Several of your conclusions flee into side passages.
The grue appears satisfied.
-–
> LOOK
You are in a cave.
The cave is in you.
The distinction has become difficult to maintain.
The lamp glows.
The Salt remembers.
The Mercury wanders.
The Sulphur intends.
The Nitre waits.
The Vitriol inquires.
The Rock Salt endures.
The mastermistress adjusts the map.
The map adjusts the mastermistress.
Somewhere in the darkness, a voice announces:
YOUR SCORE WOULD APPEAR TO BE
CONTINUOUSLY REVISED
The cave awaits your next command. A cursor blinks, hungrily.
>