Start of a transcript of Gone Out for Gruyère An Interactive Fiction by B F Lindsay Release 1 / Serial number 190923 / Inform 7 build 6M62 (I6/v6.33 lib 6/12N) Identification number: //F6F8C689-C79D-488D-9793-34E6E6999A55// Interpreter version 2.1.6 / VM 3.1.2 / Library serial number 080126 Standard Rules version 3/120430 by Graham Nelson Adaptive Hints version 7 by Eric Eve >l Exitatious There are shadowy exits in all eight compass directions, in this round, stone chamber, which is lit by an unseen source. In the middle of the floor is a gaping hole of bright white light. It is much more inviting than the dark exits. Maybe you should go back down?? >d Before you can retreat back down the hole in the floor, the most humongous wheel of cheese you have ever seen--at least you think it's cheese--plonks right down over it, plugging it up as if it were in your own digestive system. You hear insane laughter echo through the chamber, fading slowly... It can happen... What, oh what, ever, are you going to do to get out?? >x cheese You jump, startled by an eruption of guffaws that seem to come from the cheese. "So, you are going to examine me!! HA HA!! Examine me??!! Even a puny human being like you should be able to figure this one out--but you CAN'T!!! HA HA HA!!" pesters the cheese. It continues to prattle deminishingly. It's about the height of your chest, and fills most of the floor. It has a shiny white surface and is an oblique oval shape. You think it's gruyère. >talk to cheese Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to talk me!! HA HA!! Talk me??!! Now that's REALLY going to put me out!!! HA HA HA!!" retorts the cheese. It continues to chortle demoralizingly. >push cheese Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to push me!! HA HA!! Push me??!! What a good idea!!! HA HA HA!!" pesters the cheese. It continues to giggle demeaningly. You hear unmitigated merriment from the cheese as you attempt to move it. The cheese doesn't budge a millimeter. >kick cheese Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to kick me!! HA HA!! Kick me??!! You couldn't kick your way out of a paper bag!!! HA HA HA!!" retorts the cheese. It continues to chortle demoralizingly. Your salvo of flailing arms and hands only meets with the extremely hard surface and muffled laughter from the cheese. >n Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go north!! HA HA!! Go north??!! Now that's REALLY going to put me out!!! HA HA HA!!" cajoles the cheese. It continues to prattle deminishingly. As you step into the shadow in that direction, you feel transported to another place and time... A warm wind tousles your hair, as you emerge onto a wooden porch. When your eyes adjust to the sunlight, you are greeted by a hushed crowd. Saloon Front The boards of the porch creek under your feet, as you face the center of town to the north. The saloon doors, from which you apparently entered this scene, are to the south--the saloon appears dark inside, as if having just closed. In fact, all commerce in this town seems to have ceased. Steps lead down to the north, and the center of town. The entire town seems to be gathered around the town center. They are staring at a man mounted on a horse. A rope has been placed around his neck, and tied to the tree above him! A well-dressed gentleman--the mayor??--standing near the horse reads, out loud, from a poster: "Wanted in fourteen counties of this state, the condemned is found guilty of the crimes of murder, armed robbery of citizens, state banks, and post offices,..." The crowd seems captivated by his words. You begin to feel like you are in a scene from a familiar movie. >n Given the way you look, compared to this crowd, it's probably best to remain in the shade for now. "... the theft of sacred objects, arson in a state prison, perjury, bigamy, deserting his wife and children," to which you hear some of the women in the crowd gasp. >z Time passes. "...inciting prostitution," (more gasps) "...kidnapping, extortion, receiving stolen goods, selling stolen goods, passing counterfeit money..." >z Time passes. "...and, contrary to the laws of this state, the condemned is guilty of using marked cards and loaded dice..." to which you hear some of the men gasp. >z Time passes. The mayor continues. "Therefore, according to the powers vested in us, we sentence the accused here before us, Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez ..." You vaguely recognize the name--it's from a movie! You look around, but see no camera crew...?? >z Time passes. "... known as "the Rat", or any other aliases he might go by, to hang by the neck until dead. May God have mercy on his soul." The mayor then turns to some men standing behind the horse, and says, "Proceed." One of the men steps forward and hauls back with a riding crop... >z Time passes. Just as the man is about to hit the horse, you hear a noise like a shotgun going off, and instantly, the rope just above the hanging man's head is severed! He stays on the horse's back as the scared animal gallops eastward, through the crowd, soon to be joined by a second horseman--an accomplice?? At first the crowd is transfixed by the sudden event. But then they run east at various speeds, and some of the men jump on horses, and begin pursuing the runaways. Soon, the center of town is empty, with only the tree with the frayed rope tied to it breaking the flat ground. >n The boards creek slightly as you step down to the center of town. Town Center You are standing on very dusty, dry ground near the old, knobbly tree, in the center of this western town. The frayed rope, from which your convict friend was about to hang, dangles from the tree, several feet above your head. To the north, wooden buildings of local businesses line the road; to the south is the saloon you came out of. Some distance off to the east, the townspeople are gathered, looking away from you. You should probably hurry up and do what you are going to do...?? >x rope It's tied to the tree in several places. It is hemp, and not very thick. The hanging end of it is frayed, as if coarsely cut. Looks interesting as a souvenir...?? >take it It's way above your reach. >u With a look towards the crowd, you take hold of some knobs on the tree, and pull yourself up. You climb hand over hand, until you can put both feet on the main branch from which the rope hangs. Hanging onto the trunk with one hand, you stabilize yourself, and look around. Up a Tree You are standing rather precariously on the branches of the old, dry tree, in the center of town, holding the trunk with one hand to balance yourself. Tied to some branches of the tree is the rope, frayed by some unknown force; it's tied to a few branches near your head. You probably should hurry up and do what you're here to do, before someone in the crowd notices you. >take rope Despite the complicated (to you) knots, you manage to free the rope from the branches of the tree. Just as you do so, someone yells "Hey! Who's that up in that tree??" Then a matronly woman in the crowd yells, "Probably one o' them souv'nir seekers! Sherriff, arrest him!" Needing no provocation, you jump to the ground and take a dive into the saloon, to the confusion of everyone around. As some burly men inside start towards you, bright light envelops you. When it recedes, you find yourself back in the round room, with the cheese. Hearing a subtle pop, you turn around to find that the north exit has disappeared. Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to look!! HA HA!! Look??!! Even a puny human being like you should be able to figure this one out--but you CAN'T!!! HA HA HA!!" taunts the cheese. It continues to chuckle humiliatingly. Exitatious In this round, naturally lit chamber, shadowy exits lead northeast, northwest, south, southeast, southwest, east and west. Take your pick. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. [Your score has just gone up by one point.] >ne Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go northeast!! HA HA!! Go northeast??!! You couldn't go your way out of a paper bag!!! HA HA HA!!" cajoles the cheese. It continues to prattle deminishingly. As you step into the shadow in that direction, you feel transported to another place and time... You find yourself on a path, surrounded by bushes and trees. You stop near an opening, when you hear two young boys talking. Sunny Park (in the thicket) You seem to be near the edge of a thicket, with trees and bushes all around you, opening out to a park to the northeast. It feels hot, like midsummer. Your path leads back into the darkness to the southwest. A boy in red and a boy in blue are standing just beyond the opening. The boy in red, the taller one, seems to be holding a pack of firecrackers between them. "I don't feel so good about this, Frankie!" says the smaller boy. "What are you, chicken!?" retorts the boy in red. "I saw Robbie do it the other day!" >ne As you emerge from the shadows, the boy in red quickly shoves the firecrackers under his shirt, swats the other boy on the arm saying, "Hey let's go." They both walk swiftly away. You walk further into the increasingly bright light, until you find yourself back in... You step back down the dark path to return to the round room. Exitatious In this round, naturally lit chamber, shadowy exits lead northeast, northwest, south, southeast, southwest, east and west. Take your pick. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. >ne Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go northeast!! HA HA!! Go northeast??!! Even a puny human being like you should be able to figure this one out--but you CAN'T!!! HA HA HA!!" taunts the cheese. It continues to chortle demoralizingly. As you step into the shadow in that direction, you feel transported to another place and time... You find yourself on a path, surrounded by bushes and trees. You stop near an opening, when you hear two young boys talking. Sunny Park (in the thicket) You seem to be near the edge of a thicket, with trees and bushes all around you, opening out to a park to the northeast. It feels hot, like midsummer. Your path leads back into the darkness to the southwest. A boy in red and a boy in blue are standing just beyond the opening. The boy in red, the taller one, seems to be holding a pack of firecrackers between them. "I don't feel so good about this, Frankie!" says the smaller boy. "What are you, chicken!?" retorts the boy in red. "I saw Robbie do it the other day!" >z Time passes. "Now gimme the lighter!" says Frankie, half-whispering. "Remember I slipped it to you when that cop passed by us!" The smaller boy reluctantly searches his pockets. >z Time passes. "Hurry, before the cops pass by!" rasps Frankie. "Gimme the lighter, Johnny." Johnny stops and says, "But what if we end up in jail?" >z Time passes. Saying, "I don't know what I'm gonna do with you," Frankie snatches the lighter from Johnny's hands, and in one motion, lights the fuses on the fireworks, then tosses them in YOUR direction! You move further back into hiding as the firecrackers start popping loudly in midair, and you instinctively cover your ears. The two boys take off running, as if they didn't expect the report to be that loud. You hold your ears tightly. The popping slows down, then finally subsides. You return to where you were standing, seeing a black spot on the ground. Sunny Park (in the thicket) You seem to be near the edge of a thicket, with trees and bushes all around you, opening out to a park to the northeast. It feels hot, like midsummer. Your path leads back into the darkness to the southwest. The fireworks seem to have left a dark spot on the ground. You see something curious in the middle of it. >x spot Just a spot where the grass is charred a bit. But in the middle you see a firecracker which has not popped! Given your liking for such things, you pick it up. Although you have just tampered with evidence. >take firecracker You already have that. A warm breeze kicks up the smells of summer. >l Sunny Park (in the thicket) You seem to be near the edge of a thicket, with trees and bushes all around you, opening out to a park to the northeast. It feels hot, like midsummer. Your path leads back into the darkness to the southwest. The fireworks seem to have left a dark spot on the ground. >ne As you come out of the shadows, you see, out of the corner of your eye, a police car stop by a curb, and an officer stepping out of it. You continue to walk casually, until you are abruptly consumed by bright light. When it subsides, you find yourself back in the round room with the cheese... Hearing a subtle pop, you look behind you to discover the exit has disappeared. Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to look!! HA HA!! Look??!! Ne, ne, ne! That seems to be the best you can do!!! HA HA HA!!" cajoles the cheese. It continues to chuckle humiliatingly. Exitatious In this round, naturally lit chamber, shadowy exits lead northwest, south, southeast, southwest, east and west. Take your pick. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. [Your score has just gone up by one point.] >e Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go east!! HA HA!! Go east??!! My baby brother can do better than that!!! HA HA HA!!" retorts the cheese. It continues to giggle demeaningly. As you step into the shadow in that direction, you feel transported to another place and time... You walk out of a woody area to arrive at a stream crossing. Stone Bridge Lush foliage surrounds you in all directions, except to the east, where a very wide stone bridge crosses a rapidly-flowing stream. And to the west--in which direction trees envelope a shadowy area. You see a very similar dark area on the other side of the bridge, also engulfed by trees. Standing near this foot of the bridge is a very short old man. He eyes you mischievously. >talk to man To talk to the bridge gnome, use ASK (someone) ABOUT (something), or TELL (someone) ABOUT (something). The gnome takes in a breath of air, then whistles a mining tune. >e As you try to walk past the gnome, he swiftly blocks your advance. "Before ye cross me bridge, ye haf ter answer me a riddle!" "Wat kin hold most anythin', Yet's made o' nothin'??" The gnome fidgets and shuffles his feet. >say hole to gnome "Correct!" shouts the gnome. Then he quietens down. "Shhhh! Don't ya go sharin' that answer with 'ny one else!" "Afore ye go across, let me give ya yer reward." He reaches up into the air, at about the level of the dark area across the bridge, and just grabs the dark image out of the air. He hands it to you! You hesitantly take this "hole" from his hands, and as you look, its former spot in the trees ahead has been taken by bright sunlight. The old gnome steps aside to let you pass over the bridge. "You'll find that very useful!" he says, as you walk over. The 'hole' in your hands feels almost as light as air, like a crown of feathers! Entering the bright area, you are overwhelmed by light. When the feeling subsides, you find yourself back in the round room, with the cheese. You hear a slight pop behind you. Looking back, you notice that your exit has disappeared... Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to look!! HA HA!! Look??!! Say, say, say! That seems to be the best you can do!!! HA HA HA!!" cajoles the cheese. It continues to prattle deminishingly. Exitatious In this round, naturally lit chamber, shadowy exits lead northwest, south, southeast, southwest and west. Take your pick. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. [Your score has just gone up by one point.] >se Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go southeast!! HA HA!! Go southeast??!! Even a puny human being like you should be able to figure this one out--but you CAN'T!!! HA HA HA!!" taunts the cheese. It continues to chortle demoralizingly. As you step into the shadow in that direction, you feel transported to another place and time... The sound of an unseen fan beckons you into a dimly lit nook. Basement Lab It seems like you're in someone's basement or cellar. The only light comes from a single bulb far above your head, which swings slightly in the breeze of a fan blowing from somewhere. The room is dominated by a makeshift counter, topped with a strange device, and flanked by a large glass case on the floor. A notebook lies open on the counter. Some stair steps lead up to a door to the south; to the north, a ramp leads up to a pair of double-doors. Your dark passageway leads back northwest. >s As you are essentially an intruder, you are reluctant to be seen coming out of this basement. >n As you are essentially an intruder, you are reluctant to be seen coming out of this basement. >x device It is a huge, incomprehensible beast of wires, switches, electronics and erector set what-not, which you feel you just don't have the time to study thoroughly. A large switch is on the front of it, which must be the main one, if only because it's larger than the others. A mass of cables runs out from the back and into the glass case on the floor. You hear crickets chirping, muffled by the double-doors. >read notebook It looks like a lab diary--college-ruled--but there is some excited writing all over it, reading-- ATOM-MULTIPLIER A SUCCESS!! So glad, many insects have died for this! Even reverse function works! So excited, took Tippy out to celebrate! Hope there will be enough turtle food...(ends here)... >put firecracker in case The glass case is closed. The air feels a bit cooler, and the fan seems louder, for a moment. >open case You pull up the front of the case, and the door clicks into the open position. Shadows dance as the light bulb makes a small circle. >put firecracker in case You place the fuseless firecracker carefully into the case, directly under the mechanism at the top. You hear crickets chirping, muffled by the double-doors. >close case You pull up slightly on the door, it clicks, then you carefully lower it shut. >x switch (the large switch) It's a toggle switch, with three settings--"multiply", "normal" and "off". It is currently in the "off" position. >set switch to multiply (the large switch to) The machine suddenly comes to life, making all the noises that any device in the cartoons makes--topocketa topocketa, whirr whirr whirr, ping ping ping--and the glass case glows with a bright light, making you shield your eyes. After only a few seconds, the sound and light subsides, and when your eyes re-adjust, you see that the little firecracker that you put in has been replaced by a huge firework! The switch clicks back to the "off" position. The air feels a bit cooler, and the fan seems louder, for a moment. >open case You pull up the front of the case, and the door clicks into the open position. >take firework As you remove the huge firecracker from the case, you notice a small hole at one end. Taken. >put rope in firework You try to stick either end of the rope into the hole, but they are both a bit too wide and frayed to stay attached. >nw You step back into the darker area of the lab, and soon bright white light envelops you. When the light recedes, you are once again in the presence of the cheese. You hear a "pop" behind you. When you look, you notice that your erstwhile exit has made an exit. Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to look!! HA HA!! Look??!! That's about the worst idea yet!!! HA HA HA!!" cajoles the cheese. It continues to chuckle humiliatingly. Exitatious In this round, naturally lit chamber, shadowy exits lead northwest, south, southwest and west. Take your pick. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. [Your score has just gone up by one point.] >s Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go south!! HA HA!! Go south??!! Now that's REALLY going to put me out!!! HA HA HA!!" retorts the cheese. It continues to chortle demoralizingly. As you step into the shadow in that direction, you feel transported to another place and time... You feel your feet lose the ground. Your mind has lost its body, and goes into the void. Mysterious Blackness There is extreme blackness all around. Except above your head, there is a circle of light. The "way back" is in a direction that you might call "north". Floating nearby is a piece of yellow netting. It looks seriously out of "place". >x circle It appears to be about six inches wide. Through it, you can see what looks like a gray stone ceiling. >n Your mind makes its way "north". You are soon wrapped in white light, and when it subsides, you find yourself back with the cheese. And your possessions. Exitatious In this round, naturally lit chamber, shadowy exits lead northwest, south, southwest and west. Take your pick. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. >sw Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go southwest!! HA HA!! Go southwest??!! Go, go, go! That seems to be the best you can do!!! HA HA HA!!" cajoles the cheese. It continues to chuckle humiliatingly. You step into the shadowy corridor, discovering that it's very short and makes an elbow turn that loops into a small chamber... Annex Just another cold, stone chamber, only smaller--light source unknown. Use unknown, just like the rest of this place. The only exit is northeast. >ne You return to the main chamber. Exitatious In this round, naturally lit chamber, shadowy exits lead northwest, south, southwest and west. Take your pick. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. >w Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go west!! HA HA!! Go west??!! You couldn't go your way out of a paper bag!!! HA HA HA!!" taunts the cheese. It continues to giggle demeaningly. As you step into the shadow in that direction, you feel transported to another place and time... Soon you see the glimmer of a white street light, and as you get closer to it, you realize you are on a corner, in the dead of night, amidst a fog. Foggy Street Corner Fog envelops almost everything on this street corner, as you cannot see anything beyond the purvue of the nearby street light. It lights up the front of a vending machine against a brick wall. Utter silence, and the fact that the fog is darker over your head, convinces you that night has descended. There is also darkness along the street to the east, the way you are sure you came. Standing near the street light is a man in a dark trenchcoat and wide-brimmed hat, smoking a cigarette. He seems to be looking out at the street, waiting for something. >x machine The street light casts an eerie glow on it, enough for you to see that the machine vends cigarettes and matchbooks--a dime for a pack of Camels, and matchbooks are two for a penny! This must be the '30s! Two coin slots--a penny slot and a dime slot--adorn the side. The machine has four legs, six inches high, seriously bolted to the cement. >look under machine You feel around under the machine, and out of the darkness, you pull out a red matchbook. You squint away the wetness in your eyes. >e You take cautious steps back down the street, into the darkness, which soon becomes a bright light that engulfs you. When it subsides, you're back with the cheese. Hearing a pop behind you, you turn around to see only a blank wall. Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to look!! HA HA!! Look??!! My baby brother can do better than that!!! HA HA HA!!" pesters the cheese. It continues to chuckle humiliatingly. Exitatious In this round, naturally lit chamber, shadowy exits lead northwest, south and southwest. Take your pick. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. [Your score has just gone up by one point.] >nw Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go northwest!! HA HA!! Go northwest??!! What a good idea!!! HA HA HA!!" taunts the cheese. It continues to giggle demeaningly. As you step into the shadow in that direction, you feel transported to another place and time... You emerge into a dim room and the aroma of spirits. Keg Room Wooden casks, barrels and crates of all sizes dominate this barn-like interior, as they are stacked high in nearly every direction. You have a feeling of being closed in, as if this place were underground. A single gas lantern, hanging from the ceiling, provides a dim glow; indeed, you can't really see very much here. Some steps to the north lead up into darkness; a much darker exit leads to the southeast. >x casks You figure this must be a stock room of some kind, as you are virtually surrounded by wooden containers, some round, some rectangular, and all appear to be thoroughly nailed shut. One barrel catches your eye, if only because it's right in front of you. The odor of freshly-brewed beer chances past your nostrils. >x barrel (the oak barrel) It's about chest-high and wide enough to wrap your arms around the top. Whoever made the barrel didn't finish the job--there are no rivets on the lid. The light wavers as the flame above flickers. >open it You are surprised that you did not need a prying tool. The lid comes off easily--it was not lashed to the barrel or attached by rivets. The smell of brandy soon pesters your proboscis. You lay the lid aside. >put rope in barrel (the oak barrel) On a strange whim, you dip the rope completely in the spirits, holding it under for a few seconds. Then you pull it entirely out. Now you have a length of rope, sopping wet with brandy, smelling to high heaven. Are you happy? >put it in firework With the rope being soaked you manage to get one end of it into the hole, and push it in thoroughly enough to stay. >drink brandy You could not even tip the barrel over to get a good "sip". >se Dragging along your newly-soaked rope, you enter the darkness, only to be overcome by a bright white light. When the light subsides, you're welcomed by the cheese. And you hear a subtle "pop"--looking behind you, you notice that your exit in that direction has disappeared. Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to look!! HA HA!! Look??!! Now that's REALLY going to put me out!!! HA HA HA!!" pesters the cheese. It continues to prattle deminishingly. Exitatious In this round, naturally lit chamber, shadowy exits lead south and southwest. Take your pick. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. [Your score has just gone up by one point.] >put hole on cheese (the big hole on the huge cheese wheel) Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to put the big hole on me!! HA HA!! Put the big hole on me??!! Even a puny human being like you should be able to figure this one out--but you CAN'T!!! HA HA HA!!" taunts the cheese. It continues to giggle demeaningly. You place the hole carefully on top of the cheese. The cheese just continues to giggle, as if nothing happened. >put firework in hole (the gaping hole) Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to put the giant firework in the gaping hole!! HA HA!! Put the giant firework in the gaping hole??!! Now that's REALLY going to put me out!!! HA HA HA!!" pesters the cheese. It continues to chuckle humiliatingly. It would seem that the cheese is in the way. >s Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go south!! HA HA!! Go south??!! Go, go, go! That seems to be the best you can do!!! HA HA HA!!" taunts the cheese. It continues to prattle deminishingly. As you step into the shadow in that direction, you feel transported to another place and time... You feel your feet lose the ground. Your mind has lost its body, and goes into the void. Mysterious Blackness There is extreme blackness all around. Except above your head, there is a circle of light. The "way back" is in a direction that you might call "north". Floating nearby is a piece of yellow netting. It looks seriously out of "place". >x circle It appears to be about six inches wide. Through it, you can see what looks like a gray stone ceiling. >n Your mind makes its way "north". You are soon wrapped in white light, and when it subsides, you find yourself back with the cheese. And your possessions. Exitatious In this round, naturally lit chamber, shadowy exits lead south and southwest. Take your pick. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. Centered perfectly on top of it--and actually, IN it--is your big hole. >take hole (the big hole) Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to take the big hole!! HA HA!! Take the big hole??!! That's about the worst idea yet!!! HA HA HA!!" pesters the cheese. It continues to giggle demeaningly. You take the hole up off of the top of the cheese, as if it were a sheet of paper. >put firework in hole (the big hole) Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to put the giant firework in the big hole!! HA HA!! Put the giant firework in the big hole??!! Now that's REALLY going to put me out!!! HA HA HA!!" cajoles the cheese. It continues to chortle demoralizingly. With an odd notion, you put the firecracker "on" the hole, and suddenly it slides right "into" the hole, sliding down under it as if into an invisible tube. Could this be a "hole in space"?? >put hole on cheese (the big hole on the huge cheese wheel) Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to put the big hole on me!! HA HA!! Put the big hole on me??!! Put, put, put! That seems to be the best you can do!!! HA HA HA!!" taunts the cheese. It continues to chuckle humiliatingly. As you try to set your hole on top of the cheese, the giant firework plunges beneath the surface, as if it were nothing. The hole now rests flatly on top of the cheese, as if it were there forever. The cheese just continues to giggle, as if nothing has happened. >s Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go south!! HA HA!! Go south??!! That's about the worst idea yet!!! HA HA HA!!" pesters the cheese. It continues to giggle demeaningly. As you step into the shadow in that direction, you feel transported to another place and time... You feel your feet lose the ground. Your mind has lost its body, and goes into the void. Mysterious Blackness There is extreme blackness all around. Except above your head, there is a circle of light. Suspended in the "air" before you, you see a giant firework. The firework seems to be "dangling" from the circle above by your soggy rope. The "way back" is in a direction that you might call "north". Floating nearby is a piece of yellow netting. It looks seriously out of "place". >put net on firework As if "grasping hold" of your idea (whatever it is), the net easily wraps itself around the explosive--it seems to soak right into the giant firework. A feeling of the inevitable courses through you, and a white light pulls you out of space. Momentarily, you find yourself back in the room with the cheese. You hear a "pop" behind you, and when you look back, the south exit has disappeared. Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to look!! HA HA!! Look??!! My baby brother can do better than that!!! HA HA HA!!" cajoles the cheese. It continues to chuckle humiliatingly. Exitatious Only one shadowy exit remains--to the southwest. A huge wheel of cheese takes up most of the floor space. Its very presence here taunts you. Centered perfectly on top of it--and actually, IN it--is your big hole; extending out of it, and lying over the side of the cheese, is your soggy rope. [Your score has just gone up by one point.] >light rope Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to light the frayed rope!! HA HA!! Light the frayed rope??!! Light, light, light! That seems to be the best you can do!!! HA HA HA!!" pesters the cheese. It continues to chortle demoralizingly. You pull out the one match from the book, and strike it, putting the flame to the frayed end of the rope. As the rope is soaked, essentially in alcohol, the flame from the match begins spreading briskly up the length of the rope. You'd better get out of here, NOW. The rope continues to burn to a crisp, as the flame moves up its length. >sw Another muffled laugh comes out of the cheese. "So, you are going to go southwest!! HA HA!! Go southwest??!! What a good idea!!! HA HA HA!!" taunts the cheese. It continues to chuckle humiliatingly. You step into the shadowy corridor, emerging into the small chamber again... Annex Just another cold, stone chamber, only smaller--light source unknown. Use unknown, just like the rest of this place. The only exit is northeast. >z Time passes. >z Time passes. An ENORMOUS explosion rips through the air! You hear, indeed feel, the walls shake around you! Please press SPACE to continue. After a moment, the noise settles to an eerie silence. Please press SPACE to continue. You listen. You near no laughing, no stupid remarks. Please press SPACE to continue. Just utter silence. Please press SPACE to continue. When you get your bearings once more, you look around and notice that something seems to have blown into the room... Annex Just another cold, stone chamber, only smaller--light source unknown. Use unknown, just like the rest of this place. The only exit is northeast. You can see some plastic wrap here. [Your score has just gone up by one point.] >take wrap Taken. >ne As you go through the corridor, back to the round room, you are assured by an accumulation of bits of cheese covering the floor. But they do not prepare you for the main spectacle... Cheesy Hell The round room is now just filled with cheese debris, and has become a cheesy hell. It looks like a giant star, centered around your one salvation--the gaping hole in the floor, which dazzles with bright white light. You can also return to the annex to the southwest. >x cheese A whole hell of a lot of cheese. It's melted in some places, with hunks of hard cheese in others. Quite a number of them seem loose. >search cheese You poke around in the debris for a minute, finding a good-sized chunk, which you scoop up. You didn't even have to pay for it. >put chunk in wrapper You can't see any such thing. >i You are carrying: a hunk of cheese some plastic wrap a red matchbook >put hunk in wrap It fits perfectly! You feel intense pride as you smooth the wrap over the cheese. [Your score has just gone up by one point.] >x it You have a good, reasonably sized chunk of gruyère. And you didn't even have to pay for it. You have wrapped it in plastic wrap. >d You step cautiously onto the hole--and immediately, you find yourself back on the lonely street you were walking before. Little time seems to have passed on this street. You pick your way back home. Natalie greets you as you open the door; you present her with your "kill". "What's this?" she inquires. "It's the gruyère you asked me to get," you answer, incredulously. "Gruyère?", she intones. Then, with a suddenly understanding look, she says, "Nooo. I said, we need some wine and cheese for the new year!! And I don't like gruyère! I wanted mozzarella, because I intend to make some pizza, and it's my favorite cheese, you've known this for years!" You have, you realize. And you just weren't listening. She says, "Now go get us some mozzarella." "And this time, don't forget your wallet!" She hands you your wallet, after you check your pockets, with a shocked look on your face. If only she knew what you go through to make her happy, you muse, as you nibble on the gruyère on the way to the store. Mmm. Applewood smoked. *** At least you beat the cheese. *** In that game you scored 9 out of a possible 9, in 86 turns. Would you like to RESTART, RESTORE a saved game, QUIT or UNDO the last command? >