The ParserComp 2025 has one week left for submissions.
8 Likes
Thanks for the reminder. I suppose I’d better get started. 
4 Likes
As @fos1 notes so alarmingly, above, there now remains a mere 7 6 5-and-a-bit-ish days before the submission window closes!
If that isn’t enough to flood your soul with FOMO-based panic and make you plunge headlong into the centre of the chaotic whirlwind that is the parser game creation process, in a frenzied attempt to produce something half-playable before the deadline, then perhaps nothing will.
But, lest you require even more encouragement to take the first step on this fateful journey, as the dusty clock on the cobweb-wreathed mantel shelf ticks away the dolourous minutes to the submission cut-off, let me reveal the fabulous rewards that are to be bestowed on the lucky winners in this year’s competition (please ensure you are wedged most firmly in your narrowest armchair during the remainder of this communication).
Those of you familiar with the competition in years gone by will recall the magnificent, extraordinary, globally-envied, and curiously prone to rust, solid gold lamp trophy that was traditionally awarded to the winner of the competition. However, plans to continue in the same vein ran aground this year, firstly because of the eye-watering rise in the price of solid gold (it seems the current vogue for converting all worldly assets into bullion and storing it under the floorboards is set to continue for the foreseeable future; I can’t think why), and also because it turns out that that mailing potential incendiary devices around the globe, from a secretive bunker located somewhere beneath a volcano in [state redacted], is a guarantee of admission to the INTERPOL watch-list, which is a real bother when going away on holiday anywhere (you wouldn’t believe how long it took fos1 and I to get through passport control in Lanzarote last year – simply shocking). So, actual lanterns are definitely off the cards this time round. But despair not for, after a frantic few days running around ParserComp HQ with a crowbar and screwdriver, prising-off and gathering together all the solid gold-ish fixtures, fittings, and loose valuables we could lay our hands on (the bathtaps, the door-knocker, the cuff-links left in one of the guest rooms by a previous contestant, that hideous repoussé donkey plaque that fos1’s Aunt Edna brought back as a souvenir from Portugal – let’s hope she doesn’t visit us anytime soon!), we’ve managed to melt it all down and produce just enough elemental pseudo-gold to cast three exclusive, unique, and inconveniently slightly too large, commemorative medals which each of the top three game authors will receive, along with the usual certificate, warm-wishes, and 30 page summary of our terms and conditions. We’re not entirely sure what these medals will look like at this stage – mainly because Sandra on the front desk hasn’t actually got around to doing the artwork for them yet – but our plucky entrants can be assured that, whatever their final appearance, our medals, when worn prominently on top of clothing, via their gaudy ribbons, during the winners’ each and every post-competition appearance in public, for the remainder of their lifespans (as is mandatory – see our T&Cs), will be sure to attract the admiration, respect, and tight-lipped silent judgement of friends, family, and anyone else they may ever happen to encounter.
Now, if that doesn’t quell your hesitation and make you want to enter then I’m afraid you must be immune to inspiration: we wish you the very best of luck in your future endeavours, colourless though they may be. For the rest of you making up the massed hordes now baying to throw your collective hats into the ring: we look forward to your entries and will see you on the other side of the deadline!
7 Likes
itch.io is down again. They’ve been having a lot of trouble lately due to all the spammers and scammers. It usually comes back online within a couple of hours, but just on the off chance that it doesn’t come back online before submissions close, will there be an extension to the deadline?
Never mind. It’s back online, but the question still stands.
3 Likes
Hi Garry,
Yes. If itch is having troubles, the deadline can be adjusted. Than you for letting us know.
3 Likes