Everything Wrong With Doctor Who - The Time of the Doctor

Everything Wrong With The Time of the Doctor

Doctor is meant to say “It’s not like you haven’t got a lot of alternatives.”, but it comes out “It’s not like you’ve got a lot of alternatives.”, which is the opposite, sounding like he’s intimidating the head.

Doctor is shown having identified ships from a lot of spieces, but doesn’t recognize a cyberman ship from the outside.

Blatant fan service without explanation. Doctor is completely oblivious to that most british people find nudity embarrassing.

After having been told, the Doctor is still completely oblivious about this.

High guards onboard a spaceship wear forest camoflage uniforms.

The papal protectors of the universe is led by a woman apparently obsessed with sex.

Unless her name is “multiple personalities and possible control freak”, Clara avoids answering what her name is, despite the truth field making her unable to do so.

Doctor can tell it’s July by looking at his watch, despite it being on a completely different planet and snowing.

Doctor pocketed a deciphering disc on the TARDIS, just in case the atomic structure of the signal source would contain the rest of the signal cipher, and be in time lord. He also pocketed a strange plot-convenient sonic screwdriver adapter, just in case he needs to lure Clara away in a hurry.

Signal is explained to transmit complete nonsense through time and space, instead of a message.

Cyberman AI is set to automatically broadcast deciphered messages throughout entire planets and beyond.

When asked the question, the Doctor acts like he doesn’t have to immediately answer.

Doctor is shown using his screwdriver, and is shown previously fixing the crack with said screwdriver, but in 300 years, he doesn’t solve the situation by doing exactly this. Instead he chooses to stick around, putting the village at risk for 300 years.

The church can apparently notify people’s “relevant afterlives”.

Either cybermen can make themselves entirely out of wood, or church sensors and sonic screwdrivers, can not pierce through a thin cover of wood, even if the shell has openings.

Doctor sonics a flamethrower to fire backwards.

Cyberman expects the flamethrower to fire backwards instead of just exploding.

Doctor chooses to live in a truth field and still doesn’t answer the question for 300 years.

300 year stand-off is based on complete nonsense. The church knows that the Doctor will not let the time lords through, and dedicate themselves to not letting the Doctor speak the words. During 300 years, they don’t “sacrifice” him outright with a laser blast, try to apprehend him, send spies or infiltrators to mess with him or convince him, or take any actual action to prevent him from speaking his name. The other aliens have no such fears, and slip past the shield to attack the Doctor, so by now it is obvious to everyone that he won’t unleash the time lords if attacked. At this point there should be a full scale pre-time war going on over the planet, and I imagine that this should at least occationally be visible in the skies from the planet surface.

Databanks have feelings of comfort. They’re just in denial about it.

Doctor thinks he is not the eleventh doctor, or even the twelveth doctor, but the thirteenth doctor. Claims Tennants doctor (or possibly Ecclestons doctor) suffered from vanity issues so much that he killed himself to change his body but not his face. The thirteenth doctor is known as the Valeyard, and is supposed to be evil, as seen in “The Trial of a Time Lord”.

Daleks cannot figure out how to turn off the church forcefield.

Apparently even Dalek convertions, where they operate a Dalek laser barrel and its storage compartment into your brain, is reversible through sheer will, without any brain damage.

Doctor brings TARDIS aboard the church ship, but takes the planet transporter to get to it.

TARDIS dings when the time winds have finished roasting the turkey to a golden brown.

Grandmother gives complete nonsense speech. Is anybody proof-reading the script?

Clara must have the most heartless mother ever.

The church leader fights off being a Dalek for an entire war.

Doctor lets Dalek infiltrator pilot his TARDIS.

After all this time, the Doctor still does not simply fix the crack in the wall, instead choosing to let everybody die in a war.

Daleks would fear the Doctor if he had more regenerations left, instead of just shooting him a second time, killing him permanently (like River Song taught us for a whole season).

Doctor generations now take down huge Dalek motherships. …without crashing it into the planet. I am speechless. This episode had an unusual number of bright moments for a Moffat episode, but in the end, it always reaches a complete meltdown. Why must you do this every time, Moffat? This is like a teacher pulling down his pants and urinating on the students at the end of all of his lectures. You build something up, just so that you can go completely insane with it, because you don’t have the slightest clue on how to solve plots, and this is horrifying, because at the same time you are apparently writing a show about Sherlock Holmes, and I’m even scared now, to watch a single episode of that show, because I don’t want to know how badly you screw up a(nother) show about deductive reasoning.

Regeneration then “resets” the Doctors age, before instantly changing him without any transition.

New doctor looks like a cross between David Tennant and Christopher Lee. He can’t be worse than Smith’s doctor. …can he?

[rant]“Sherlock is a triumph, witty and knowing, without ever undercutting the flair and dazzle of the original. It understands that Holmes isn’t really about plot but about charisma … Flagrantly unfaithful to the original in some respects, Sherlock is wonderfully loyal to it in every way that matters.”

  • Tom Sutcliffe, The Independent

If I remember the books well enough, Sherlock Holmes had all the “charisma” of a dry piece of ash wood. His defining personality traits were playing a violin and smoking opium, and that was it. The television series portrayed him as an obnoxious, stern twat, and even that was giving his “charisma” too much credit. When Christopher Lee could have played the character in a more warmhearted way, they were probably not shooting for “charismatic”. Sherlock Holmes is the very staple of deductive reasoning, and that’s what his audience looked for when they read or watch him. Sherlock Holmes was so smart that the books were just Watsons bedazzlement with how smart he was.
I’m not going to watch any episodes of Sherlock, but it seems that all this somehow passed Moffat by. At this point I’m wondering if Moffat can tell reason from make-belief.
I’m just so mad.[/rant]

Oh dear. A bunch of my friends keep going on about how Dr Who was a let down because of x, y, z reasons. It’s a bit of a puzzle why people continue to watch a show they find so unsatisfying. Emotional investment?

(A side note: according to the Who wiki, the Valeyard merely impersonated the 13th doctor. But really, with such a long show with so many recent reboots, who knows what could be canon.)

Doctor Who currently feels very hit and miss to me. Some episodes are great, while others are let downs. Frequently the let downs are Steven Moffat’s, who himself is especially hit and miss. I think what he should do is get a co-showrunner, because it seems like when he’s got complete control he can’t use it properly. And unlike Andreas I really liked Matt Smith’s portrayal of the Doctor, even though he got given some really badly written stories. It’s not perfect, but it’s still good.

Yes, very much so. I was suckered into Doctor Who by Tennant and RTD, that made the series for intelligent watchers, and presented a world that made sense, where sense created a plot, with dangers and hilarity that you could understand. Sci-fi directed toward intelligent people, is hard to come by, so I was blown away, and I couldn’t imagine that the show would rapidly transform into its complete opposite before my very eyes - into a show by a moron, for morons. First I stuck around because of hope. Now I just stick around mostly to poke fun of it. Moffat broke every bone in the body of the show, and still makes it walk for a short period once a year, and at this point I’m looking on with horrified fascination.

I didn’t know that. There’s been a lot fo talk about how the show would play out the Valeyard, and with the War Doctor, Moffat seemed to flirt with the concept, only to give another let down. Moffat couldn’t do it, because he can’t do anything that would require cunning. Grr.

Why I liked Moffats episodes, was that at least they were canon. All the guest writers he hired, wrote self-contained, disjointed story lines, that had no arching storyline. …but at this point, I’m beginning to agree with you.

…and yes, Matt Smiths doctor was great to begin with, and Matt Smith had very much the potential to play a great Doctor, but on the other hand he seemed tailored to suit whimsical nonsense plots. I’m desperately hoping that the next Doctor will be serious enough to make Moffat take him seriously. …but Tennant’s Doctor was portrayed just as slapstick as Smith’s in the episode before this, so I’m clinging to nothing here.